Andy Barlow Blog

I saw him for the 1st time yesterday.

I was driving from Sinton to Rockport on Hwy. 188 as he was walking that same route. He had most likely been several hours in front of me until I passed him at 70mph. In fact, I might have passed him on my way to Sinton about 2 hours earlier, but I didn’t notice.

1000s of acres of flat, pre-planted farmland surrounded us both, and the wind swept unbridled across it, pushing against both of us as we journeyed. My backpack was laying in the back seat of my car. His, containing most likely all of his possessions, was heaved upon his back as he trudged wearily along.

I don’t know where he slept last night, but I saw him for the 2nd time today.

As I left to get lunch at Subway, I saw that same skinny silhouette walking down the side of FM 3036. He must have walked right in front of Coastal Oaks Church, but he didn’t come in.

My heart hurts as I wonder why.

Did he have a bad church experience as a child? Did a church in the last town in which he stopped treat him in a way that would cause him to lose faith in other churches? I don’t know, but I wonder.

As I passed him for the 2nd time in as many days, my heart screamed, “You can’t pass him again!”, though my car seemed completely unaware of his existence. We don’t see truly homeless people that often in our little sleepy, coastal community. Even those who are seen are quickly ignored and left to fend for themselves. Maybe that’s what caused me to want to pass him by so quickly.

I drove on, trying to ignore the still, small voice of God – only it sounded more like the live, multi-chime horn of a freight train coming my way (Metallica pun intended). By the time I arrived at Subway and ordered my sandwich, my stomach was almost completely upside down.

James 2 was running laps inside my head – “Go, I wish you well; keep warm and well fed…”

What if he tried to hurt me? What if he made the seats in my car smell? What if he asked for something I could not give him? What if that for which he asked would require a sacrifice? All of these questions pounded against my skull like they were about to break the skin and at this point, I hadn’t even spoken to the man.

At that moment as I stood ordering my lunch, another verse came to mind – “the least of these” from Matthew 25:35-40. I was standing at the counter of a sandwich shop, but what could I possibly do for someone like him. Umm, maybe order him a sandwich?!? I know, it was my Homer Simpson moment of today – “Doh!” What seems so obvious now was genuinely suffocated by the fear I felt in the previous moments. And it was stupid and disobedient.

So I decided to obey and ordered him a sandwich – combo meal even. Then I hoped as I left that I could find him. As I drove north on Bus. 35 back in the direction from which I came, my heart grew lighter as I spotted that blue tarp covered backpack, now turned north on SH35 headed out of town.

I caught up to him, in the same car in which I had passed him 2 times previously, in front of Jimmy Woods Produce Market and pulled in. About the time I was able to stop, he was passing by my car door. So I opened it and caught his attention. He obviously didn’t expect me to speak to him. He also obviously didn’t expect me to ask if he was hungry. And he really obviously didn’t expect for me to hand him food.

I didn’t get his name, nor did he offer it. I couldn’t help him get where he was going. But he gladly accepted the bag I handed him from my passenger’s seat. I’ve talked a bit about the senseless fear I felt today, but let me now speak about the regret I still feel. The regret I feel is that I only gave him a sandwich and not more of my time – more of me. Fear reduced me today to a shell of the Christ-follower I claim to be, and it only left me with regret.

For the Christ-follower out there: be obedient. Be compassionate. Seek out the “leasts” in your town – they are there, I promise. Pray for opportunities to meet whatever needs you are able to meet. Have faith in God, He cares for you. Commit to glorify God on days other than Sunday, or whenever you go to church. Jesus loves them today and so should you – so should I.